“Mister Bull” – A little Hold’em fiction

Ronald Pittenger, known as Alan25main on Replay Poker, contributes a bit of poker fiction to our blog! Check out “Mister Bull” below, a narrative he’s written and shared with us. For anyone who’s encountered a brash player who likes to go all-in time and time again, you’ll enjoy this one!

“Please, Great Dealer, make it just a quiet game, Smitty silently hoped. No maniacs, no fights, just a quiet game to pass some time. And, if there have to be fireworks, let me win them.

Playing low blind No Limit Hold’em couldn’t be counted on to have no maniacs, no fights, and no excitement, but he knew all the other players from past encounters. All were solid citizen types with no swashbucklers at the table. There was one open seat, immediately to Smitty’s left, the most dangerous seat for Smitty if a wild one came along. Smitty’s mood soured as the newest player sat down.

Bull_Of_Bulls, he called himself. He bought in for the table’s maximum.

“I don’t think I’ve noticed you here before, Bull. Are you new?” Smitty asked, as he posted his big blind. Bull immediately posted his blind and a straddle as the dealer shuffled.

“What’s it to you?” Bull asked. His voice was frosty but not overtly threatening.

“If you’re new, welcome, but enjoy the game either way.”

“Oh, I intend to,” replied Bull. The cards were dealt. Two players called the doubled bet. Smitty looked at his not-much hand and mucked it in his turn.

Bull barely looked at his cards before announcing “All in.” He shoved chips to the center of the felt. After a moment, each of the remaining two folded. Bull mucked and dragged the pot.

Smitty posted his small blind; Bull, the big. Again, two players called, and again, Smitty folded his nothing hand. Again, Bull went all in. Very slowly, first one and then the other folded.

So, that’s the way it’s going to be, thought Smitty, fireworks after all. Today had been a good day until now; Smitty had about double Bull’s stack. He also had about a hundred times Bull’s patience.

The shortest stack at the table looked at his cards, pondered a moment and went all in. Play folded around to Bull, who called. Bull turned up A-Q off suit, Short stack turned up ten-ten. The flop was ten-jack-king rainbow. Trips versus a made Broadway. The turn and river were blanks. Shorty retired from the table.  “Good game, good luck, guys,” Shorty said as he left.

“Good game,” some of the others mumbled. Play continued. Bull continued to dominate with the others folding.

On Smitty’s next big blind, he picked up queen-queen. To his surprise, Bull didn’t go all in, though he made a substantial bet. He’s weak, thought Smitty. Nobody gets great cards every hand. Caution told Smitty not to overplay his hand. He just called.

The flop was Ace-queen-queen. Bull’s eyes lit up. “All in,” he announced.

Smitty smiled. “I call. What do you have?”

Bull proudly exposed his A-A. “The best full house. You?”

“The queens. ALL the queens.” Bull looked like he’d been shot. The dealer turned two nothing cards and pushed the pot toward Smitty.

“Isn’t there a bad beat jackpot for losing with Aces full?” Bull asked.

“Nope,” said the dealer. “Would you like to re-buy, Sir?” he asked brightly.

“No,” shouted Bull, “I think this game is crooked! I want my money back. Right now!”

So suddenly that no one saw them coming, there were two very large, serious looking men were standing next to Bull. Both of them were smiling the smile a shark wears when it senses bloody water. “Dealer, is there a problem here?” one asked calmly, though his eyes never left Bull.

“No, Top, I don’t think so. Mr. Bull was deciding whether to re-buy or leave,” the dealer said calmly.

“Mr. Bull, I understand there’s a slot machine tournament starting right around the corner in about five minutes. Registration is still open, if you’d like to try that,” said Top.

The fire in Bull’s eyes dimmed. “Do you know what it costs to enter?” he asked.

“It’s very comparable to this game, sir. The card room cashier might be able to give you a discount coupon, if we hurry. Don’t want to miss the start, you know.”

Bull and his new two-man entourage left, not quite running toward the cashier’s cage.

Please, Great Dealer, just let the rest of the night be quiet. Please?”